Image by The Wolters Family

Levi and his father, Lance Wolters, on Levi's wedding day in August 2008.

I’m Levi. I’m the marketing guy at Arkansas Business Publishing Group. My wife, Erin, and I, both originally from Kansas, have been married almost three years. We are having our first child in July, and my wife has given me permission to share our journey with you in hopes of learning a lot from you about parenting, babies and everything else that is sure to shock us in the coming months and years.

“The Daddy Diaries” Begins…

 One of the things I hear a lot these days is, “You’re going to be a great dad.”

I like that. It’s a simple sentence, but it always makes me feel a little more comfortable about this impending journey, which, as I’ve been assured many times, will be filled with millions of moments and emotions I can’t even imagine, let alone prepare myself for.

Of course, I don’t know if I’m going to be a great dad like they say. Now a month away from becoming a father, I certainly have more questions than answers. I know how to do a few things but don’t have a clue about so many others. What do I know about being a great dad?

Here’s what I do know: My dad is great.

Though always incredibly busy, my dad always had time. He has worked in and around agriculture his whole life. It’s a career path I never had much interest in, and that was fine with him. He never once forced it on me, though he always welcomed me to join him for a day on the farm or in the field whenever I wanted. When I did, it was exciting to watch and listen. He talked about bushels and acres and heads of cattle. He’d do math in his head faster than I thought possible. We’d work – well, he’d work; I’d observe – from 7 a.m. to 10 p.m. It all seemed so complicated and tiresome, but his work ethic made it look impossibly simple.

He taught me about hard work and how to love, even when you’re busy. He taught me how to tell funny stories and work a socket wrench. He told me never to smoke cigarettes and to wear a tie at my granddad’s funeral – thankfully I listened to both. He took me to baseball games on family vacations, even though I know they bored him. He asked my permission before he proposed to my stepmom, and then asked me to be his best man at their wedding.

We didn’t have many deep talks like fathers and sons sometimes do. They never felt necessary. I see it like this: He taught me right from wrong and good from bad very early in my life. He made it clear he was the father and I was the son and I reported to him. There shouldn’t be questions or arguments. And he was right. There were rarely any. We were friends.

Nowadays, we’re separated by 700 miles. Thanks in small part to technology and in large part to our relationship, it doesn’t seem that far. We talk on the phone every Sunday night. Nearly every time, we laugh until we’re in tears about something silly. I like Sunday nights.

He’s a great dad. But will I be a great dad? I don’t know.

Will the blueprint he used to be a great dad be the right blueprint for me to follow for my child? Every child is different, they say, so maybe the leash of independence and relaxed environment he gave me might not be best for my own. Your turn:

  • What, in your eyes, makes a good father?
  • Why was your dad a great dad?
  • Why is your husband a great dad?

Leave your comments below. I want to hear - and learn - from you!

 

Coming up on The Daddy Diaries ...

The fine folks at Little Rock Family have given me the platform to write about becoming a father. I appreciate the opportunity and am excited about what it will become (and a little scared of what it might not become). The blog will culminate with a live running diary from the hospital on the day of the birth!  Won’t that be fun? To make this work, though, I need your help. I want this to be interactive and fun, so please ask questions, make some comments and, of course, offer me advice!